...what did you call it, Tiranel? A 'meme'? o_o

2004-09-09T02:06:55Z

Interesting.

Someone suggested I fill this out. The voice in my head (which sounds suspiciously like agentrosecotton) agreed with them.

(I have referred to myself in this form in the third person. Don't mind Melanin; she's crazy.)

character's name: Melanin Butterfly

nickname: Mel, or Melbee (hates being called this)

age: uncertain; around 17

date of birth: also uncertain; born in the Matrix continuum, sometime between The Matrix and The Matrix: Reloaded. Celebrates her birthday on November 12.

gender: female

power: Able to jump fandoms

codename: none

group: Department of Technical Errors

description.
face: looks oddly like Catherine Zeta-Jones
eyes: Natural green (e.g.: not ‘emerald’, ‘mystical’, ‘glittering’ etc; just boring old green). Change to brown when she is feeling particularly Suvian.
skin colour/shade: Pale, porcelain-skinned Caucasian
hair colour: Raven black
hair style: Long, straight, silky, Suvian
build: Tall and slender, graceful etc.
height: about 5"9
weight: unknown?
birthmarks: none
tattoos: none
piercings: none

personality: As Sue; snarky, moody, angsty, warrior!Suvian, bitchy, egotistical, rebellious, a feminist. As PPC agent; innocent, quiet, timid, slightly child-like, absent-minded, always just out-of-the-loop. Basically, the PPC took her and rewrote her brain, taking away all her Suvian qualities. She somehow retained her ability to jump dimensions and fandoms, however, which is useful, as she doesn’t need a portal generator (something which drives her partner crazy).

fears: Avril Lavigne, Suvianism, machines/technology, pointy objects (see ‘Family’)

strengths: eager to please; more resilient to Suvianism than she thinks; quite adept at fighting with shiny objects; knows the mind of Sues and therefore is good at fighting them

weaknesses: Suvianism, Avril Lavigne songs, the !!!!!11 convention, glitter, etc.

mental problems (if any): Wheeeeeee1!11

nationality/race: half-Gondorian, half-unplugged Matrixite; human

religion: PPC

life history (including how his/her powers manifested): Melanin was born the illegitimate child of a most unlikely couple (see ‘Family’). Her mother could not keep her; so she was left on her father’s doorstep. Unfortunately, her father was dead; so her uncle and his wife took her in and raised her in Ithilien (LotR-verse). She grew up an angsty, moody warrior!Sue, wearing black leather and refusing to be courted by those ‘chauvinistic pigs OMG!!!11' of her hometown. She was informed at the age of 16 of her true heritage, and in anger, she ran away from home. Managing to find her way to Lothlorien, she found Galadriel and was told that she somehow had this mysterious dimension-skipping gift. She immediately went to the fandom from which her mother came; unfortunately, her mother had canonically died some fourteen years before. Angry and heartbroken, she returned to her homeworld, where she spent about two minutes sobbing under a large mallorn before Legolas found her. Just as she was getting into a slightly dramatized version of her life story, the PPC showed up. They were ready to kill her, when, during the charge list, she said something vaguely sentient. Amazed, they scanned her with their Ubercool Gadgets of Teh Doom (tm), and found...traces of canon! It turned out that she was written by a PPC agent gone mad, and that if they just looked hard enough, she was salvageable. She was recruited. After spending quite some time in Fictional Psychology on a strict anti-Suvian regimen, she was released on an unsuspecting partner, one Agent Tiranel van de Kamp.

(See extended life story here.)

family: biological parents – Boromir son of Denethor, Trinity of Zion; adopted parents – Faramir and Éowyn of Ithilien

current home: response centre 47, DTE, PPC HQ

Likes: Legolas/Prince Paris/Will Turner/Rentboy/Orlando Bloom (to the disgust of her veteran partner), weapons, a good battle (of the wits or of the swords, whichever), the colour blue, small furry animals

Dislikes: Anything that reminds her of her former life, including the following: the colour pink, glitter, angsty!warrior!Sues, Avril Lavigne, etc. Coffee, coffeine, *and* bleepka, for some incomprehensible reason. And she cannot stand eating with plastic cutlery.

Hobbies: Reading (specifically Tolkien, as it tells her more about how her origins *should* have been), macrame with hemp, computer programming (something she has quite a knack for – not surprising, considering her heritage)

Fav. Colour: blue

Hated Colour: Pink. DIE GLITTERBLOODS DIE!

Fav. Foods: PPC rations (!!!), sushi, other Oriental delicacies

Hated Foods: Peas, sugary things, chocolate (oddly enough), popcorn

Fav. Animal: Tribbles, mini-Balrogs/Jem’Hadar/CSM/etc., geckos

Hated Animal: bugs (though she likes spiders, especially tarantulas), targs, most sea creatures (she thinks they’re slimy)

Fav. Movies: None, yet. She was raised in LotR-verse and doesn’t watch many movies at the PPC.

Hated movies: See above.

Fav. TV shows: Star Trek, occasionally, but only through the novels/research manuals Tiranel (who is an ex-Trekker agent) has lying around.

Hated TV shows: See ‘Movies’.

Fav. Music style(s): Classical, alternative, easy listening, oldies, some soft country, and old Broadway soundtracks

Hated Music style(s): Pop, rock, heavy/death metal, angst-oh-my-angsty-angst!life-is-so-hard!pity-me!music, punk etc.

Fav. Band: The Beatles.

Hated Band: AVRIL LAVIGNE. Parts of her past are overshadowed by a subliminal Avril track. And she doesn’t like boybands or Evanescence.

Addictions: guys (who, during most of her life, have also been addicted to her, but who’ve suddenly and inexplicably started becoming traumatized at the sight of her, and run away screaming “Suvian! Suvian! SUVIAN IN THE HALLWAY!”), books and literature, spiffy clothes, herbal tea with honey

Crush: Agent Techno-Dann from Sufficiently Advanced Technology. He fixed her CAD once, and she took one look at him and fell madly, irrevocably in love. He currently has absolutely *no* idea who in hell she is, and she’s far too shy to approach him. We shall wait and see....
Also: Pippin, Jake Sisko, Jean-Luc Picard, and Fox Mulder.

Rivals: None, that she knows of. She’s a rather peaceful person. Sue!Melanin had plenty of them, though.

Enemies: See above.

Friends: Agent Tiranel (more or less); not many others. As said before, she’s just had a brain-wipe done.

Do you want to get a boyfriend/girlfriend: DANN. *drool*

Clothes.

casual: Very simple; jeans, T-shirt, running shoes, etc. Sometimes she’ll suddenly go Matrix for a day, and wear black leather head-to-toe, or will revert to her Suvian status, and start dying her hair strange colours and dressing like Christina Aguilera. This is rare, however, and her personality remains unaffected despite her choice of clothing.

uniform: Ordinary black PPC uniform, badge of Uncommon Comma on shoulder.

formal: Starfleet dress-uniform. For no reason whatsoever.

PJ's: Sleeps in her clothes, as is necessary at the PPC.

swimming suit: ...and this is relevant how?

make-up (girls only!!!): None. She despises it. With a passion.

Notes: Melanin carries with her a perpetual sense of confusion, something that comes from having her mind wiped clean (specifically when there wasn’t much in there in the first place). She is constantly annoying her partner, Agent Tiranel, by accident. For instance, Melanin’s ability to jump fandoms, something she’s accustomed to and is very good at, bugs the hell out of Tiranel, who is resigned to using conventional methods such as the portal generator.

Random Mission:
Tiranel, mumbling to self: Lord of the Rings-verse, just after ... hmm ... Balrog ... Lothlorien ... River Anduin ... Amon Hen! Coordinates 447 by 423...
Melanin: Right. *disappears*
Tiranel: Wha – HEY! GET BACK HERE!
Melanin: *reappears* Yes?
Tiranel: *glare* Don’t *do* that!
Melanin: (slightly confused) Oh. Sorry?

Melanin’s history of Lego-lusting also drives Tiranel crazy.

Random Setting:
Tiranel: ...and Torias is just so *hot* in that flight suit. *glances at Melanin* You have any lust objects?
Melanin: ...Well, I always thought Legolas was kind of cute...
Tiranel: NO.
Melanin: No?
Tiranel: No, you did not. Never. Ever.
Melanin: ...Okay?

On reading Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett....

2004-07-24T21:33:53Z

I've been reading some of Tiranel's reference materials lately. Required reading material for all PPC agents, or so she says. Some of them really are fascinating. F'rex, take these two British writers, Terry Pratchett and Douglas Adams.

Interesting what some of these Earth writers can come up with. Things they have no way of knowing, but manage to think up anyway.

Take Terry Pratchett, for example. The man was born and raised on Earth, the most backwards, stubborn planet in the Multiverse. He had no way of knowing anything about the way space works; how some things are realer than others, and how the universe is carried around in a little black leather bag by a little old man with a cane. Granted, PTerry forgot the cane, but he came astonishingly close to the truth. Maybe that's why half the world loves him, and half the world can't stand him; he appeals to those with a sense of reality that goes beyond what their backwards world offers as answers. Now, PTerry had no notion of God; his gods were, at best, feeble and insignificant compared to The Real Thing, the Alpha and the Omega, the great I Am. Still, one wonders if the man is really a Discworld wizard left on Earth by accident and doing his best to make a living.

And Douglas Adams...now that man was truly frightening. How in hell could he know about Earth's destruction for an interstellar roadway? It didn't happen in his universe -- and yet he knew about it. And Ford Prefect nearly passed out when he read the Earth version of his favourite book. Not to mention that whole bit with the towel. It's truly amazing.

There are even those who see not only the past from other universes, but the future as well. For instance, the Wachowski Brothers. They have no way of knowing what's happening in the universe two blocks away and three houses down. And yet they wrote it almost spot-on into a blockbuster movie. Or Isaac Asimov. The three laws of robotics. Now, that Earth may be the most backward and narrowminded planet in the Multiverse, but every once in a while, a light shines through. A brilliant individual suddenly has a revelation, and suddenly sees more than just what's in front of his face.

It's been theorized that there are a few select people on this planet who are different. It's sort of like the red-pills in the Matrix universe, or the superhero types in the Comic Book universe. They're just a little off; they don't fit with the masses. They don't see what isn't there; they see what is there -- which, to quote the aforementioned PTerry, is much more difficult.

It truly is amazing.

But, after all, gravity, distance, and relative mass are what make the world go round.

G'day! (Yes, I know I'm not Australian....)

2004-07-17T22:15:21Z

...hello?

My name is Agent Melanin, and I am a PPC agent.

anti_glitter is my response centre. I live there. Or, at least, I pretend to. Really I live in the fandom, protecting it from Mary Sues.

Like me.

See, I am an ex-Mary Sue. I joined the Sue Support group a while ago, and my story can be found there.

Now *where* is Tiranel? I spent all day cleaning and revamping our RC, and then she doesn't *show*.

Rrg.

Agent Melanin's Tale

...what did you call it, Tiranel? A 'meme'? o_o

On reading Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett....

G'day! (Yes, I know I'm not Australian....)